Couples And Sex Therapy
Sooner or later all relationships face difficulties in communication. Learning to live with another soul is challenging and takes time, effort and work. As no two people are alike, we often choose our mates without appreciating the complexity of negotiating between our desire to be respected for our uniqueness and autonomy and our desire to be connected to another. These seemingly polar struggles are often central to the underlying dynamics that everyone faces. In a supportive atmosphere, without blame, shame or judgment, these dynamics are explored and concrete behavioral information and skills are provided to enhance couple communication, connection and caring.
Love and Sex
A couple’s sexuality can be a wonderful part of their life and a relationship is best if it includes a mutually enjoyable sexual exchange. Sexuality can also be a source of distress, uncertainty and insecurity. Although there are many excellent new drugs on the market to enhance sexual performance, sexuality is about communication and in the absence of a good relationship or just anxiety the best drugs are inadequate. Millions of men and women would like to enhance their emotional and sexual relationships but all too often, shame, fear and embarrassment prevent individuals and couples from discussing their concerns with doctors, family or friends. Although, it is normal to experience some anxiety, or be upset or angry with one’s partner, many people do not have the tools to resolve these difficulties. As a result, problems which can be easily solved are left unattended, only to fester and become more severe and are expressed in the bedroom.
What is Sex and Couple Consultation?
Sex and couple consultation is a vehicle whereby an individual or couple has an opportunity to explore the unhappiness associated with their relationship. This occurs within a relaxed informal environment in the guidance of a professionally trained therapist who is attuned to the nuances of intimate communication and sexual problems. We successfully treat individuals and couples who struggle with sex and intimacy. Where appropriate, colleagues are consulted to provide diagnostic and medical assistance.
Since, marriage is a deeply complex system, most of us communicate with our partners physically as well as spiritually and emotionally. Sexual expression changes throughout one’s life and is affected by multiple factors within each individual and each couple. Along with commitment, there is chaos, change and conflict, and often these feelings get expressed in bed. There are no magic potions or instant solutions when we fall out of lust. Truly recognizing and deeply appreciating one’s own needs and those of one’s partner with love, compassion and respect can rekindle the flame of passion and understanding.
Our Approach Integrates Couple and Sex Therapy
Many therapists have extensive training in working with individuals, but traditional graduate traditional training programs often do not have specializations combining couple and sex training. Our associates have post graduate training in this disciple as we believe that in order to effectively help couples who are struggling with sexual concerns, a model which utilizes a combined appreciation of couple communication and sexual dynamics is crucial.
Our Approach Integrates Mindfulness
So many individuals and couples struggle with the laundry list of life that being physical with each other becomes secondary to running the “corporate marriage”. Concerns about the chores of life, physical attractiveness such as whether “I am pretty enough, handsome enough, sexy enough” and or a myriad of other life stresses often interfere with just being and just pleasure. Mindfulness training can help people with suffering that comes from not being present and not being in your body by helping you learn the following:
Avoid judgments or evaluations
Realize the journey is the goal
Allowing non-interfering attention or awareness to be present
Focus on the wise use of intention
Kindness or love comes with practice , mindfulness and meditation
Balance and non-reactivity